Jan 31 - Dead Souls

"Dead Souls" is a cover of the Joy Division song that was originally done in 1979 on their album Still. "Dead Souls" is thought to be about a schizophrenic man as heard in the lyric "a duel of personalities" and also "they keep calling me". This version is on The Crow Soundtrack as well as the Japanese 2 Disc Delux version of The Downward Spiral.

    Someone take these dreams away
    That point me to another day
    A duel of personalities
    That stretch all true reality
    
    They keep calling me
    Keep on calling me
    
    When figures from the past stand tall
    And mocking voices ring the hall
    Imperialistic house of prayer
    Conquistadores who took their share
    
    They keep calling me
    Keep on calling me
    
    Calling me

Jan 30 - Closer (Internal)

Closer (Internal) is the sixth track off of Closer To God or Halo 9. This song has a tendency to vacillate between the left and right speakers. I always thought that this song would sound kick ass in a movie.

Jan 29 - Help Me I am In Hell

"Help Me I am In Hell" is the fourth track off the album Broken or Halo 5. This song is purely an instrumental and very interesting as it builds to go into the next song "Happiness In Slavery". You might notice the 'thunder' in the background of the song. Love!!

Jan 28 - My Violent Heart

"My Violent Heart" is the eighth track off the album Year Zero or Halo 24. This was actually the first song to be leaked off the album. I remember being in California and the rock station KROQ played this song in heavy rotation... I was psyched! I loved hearing NIN on the radio!! No station in Arizona ever played NIN on a steady basis. The only song that was played was "Closer" and that was a rarity.

I bought this album the day it was released on April 13, 2007. I remember listening to the CD all day in my Mini Cooper S. I even put the windows down on the 405N and jammed home to this song!!

    You and I we may look the same
    But we are very far apart
    There's bullet holes where my compassion used to be
    And there is violence in my heart
    Into fire you can send us
    From the fire we return
    You can label us a consequence
    Of how much you have to learn
    
    You can try but you'll never understand
    This is something you will never understand
    Can you hear it now?
    Hear it coming now?
    Can you hear it now?
    
    On hands and knees
    We crawl
    You can not stop us all
    You wear our bones
    Our skin
    We will not let you in
    
    You have set something in motion
    Much greater than you've ever known
    Standing there in all your grand naïveté
    About to reap what you have sown
    Time will feed upon your weaknesses
    And soon you'll lose the will to care
    When you return to the place that you call home
    We will be there
    We will be there
    
    On hands and knees
    We crawl
    You can not stop us all
    Our blood
    Will stay
    We will not go away
    On hands and knees
    We crawl
    You can not stop us all
    Our blood
    Our grace
    Will never leave this place

You have set something into motion Much greater than you've ever known,
Standing there in all your grand naivete, About to reap what you have sown.

YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE....

Jan 27 - March Of The Pigs (AATCHB)

"March Of The Pigs" is the third track off the album And All That Could Have Been or Halo 17 CD1. AATCHB is a live CD of the Fragility Tour v2.0 in 2000. This song is one of those fantastic songs that Trent did in multiple time measures... Just a blast to jam to! I love this song!!

On NinWiki, I found this: Lyrically, the song could be about society or NIN's fans, but Trent Reznor has stated in the interview titled Disturbed that the "pigs" in this song refer mainly to "anywhere from the media to people he thought were friends around him." Furthermore, he said, "The issue I was addressing was... when we attained a certain level of success, it was surprising to see the legion of people starting to fuck with you, can't wait to see you fail, hoping that you'll fuck up, ripping you off, trying to use you... The fact that American media, in 'underground world,' you go from being the darling to 'well, we accidentally started selling some records,' so they have to turn their backs on us." He also occasionally referred to fans as 'pigs' at live performances.

All the pigs are all lined up....

    Step right up march push
    Crawl right up on your knees
    Please greed feed (no time to hesitate)
    I want a little bit I want a piece of it I think he's losing it
    I want to watch it come down
    Don't like the look of it don't like the taste of it don't like the smell of it
    I want to watch it come down
    
    All the pigs are all lined up
    I give you all that you want
    Take the skin and peel it back
    Now doesn't that make you feel better?
    
    Shove it up inside surprise! Lies
    Stains like blood on your teeth
    Bite chew suck away the tender parts
    I want to break it up I want to smash it up I want to fuck it up
    I want to watch it come down
    Maybe afraid of it let's discredit it let's pick away at it
    I want to watch it come down
    
    All the pigs are all lined up
    I give you all that you want
    Take the skin and peel it back
    Now doesn't that make you feel better?
    The pigs have won tonight
    Now they can all sleep soundly
    And everything is all right

Jan 26 - You Know Who You Are

"You Know Who You Are" is the fifth track off the Head Like A Hole maxi-single or Halo 3. This song is truly the first instrumental that Trent ever did. It was remixed by Trent & Flood. I really love this version, all the synth's and the tribal like chanting is fantastic!! Just put down the windows & drive!

Jan 25 - Right Where It Belongs

"Right Where It Belongs" is the thirteenth track off the album With Teeth or Halo 19. It is the last song on Halo 19 and could not be more fitting. With the piano at the end, it gives a beautiful finality to this album. I love how the NINWiki describes this song, "Heavily atmospheric, its opening ambiance transitions from the end of "Beside You In Time" into its first quiet musical elements, a bouncing bass line and guitar riff accompanying a piano lead and soon Reznor's melodic vocals. New melodies and changes join Reznor's choruses, but all of the layers seem muffled and distant throughout. The second verse is characterized by a unique sonic change only found in this NIN song: upon singing the last line of the verse, all the layers become much clearer, soon joined by a cheering crowd erupting as the second and final chorus begins. Reznor quietly and wordlessly accompanies the repeating final piano melody, which ends the song alone."

Heavily atmospheric. Lovey way to describe this song.

    See the animal in his cage that you built
    Are you sure what side you're on?
    Better not look him too closely in the eye
    Are you sure what side of the glass you are on?
    See the safety of the life you have built
    Everything where it belongs
    Feel the hollowness inside of your heart
    And it's all
    Right where it belongs
    
    What if everything around you
    Isn't quite as it seems
    What if all the world you think know
    Is an elaborate dream?
    And if you look at your reflection
    Is that all you want to be?
    What if you could look right through the cracks
    Would you find yourself—find yourself afraid to see?
    
    What if all the world's inside of your head
    Just creations of your own?
    Your devils and your gods all the living and the dead
    And you're really all alone
    You can live in this illusion
    You can choose to believe
    You keep looking but you can't find the woods
    While you’re hiding in the trees
    
    What if everything around you
    Isn't quite as it seems
    What if all the world you used to know
    Is an elaborate dream?
    And if you look at your reflection
    Is that all you want to be?
    What if you could look right through the cracks
    Would you find yourself—find yourself afraid to see?

Would you?

January Playlist

Jan 24 - Ringfinger

"Ringfinger" is the last track (tenth) on Pretty Hate Machine or Halo 2. I could not think of a more fitting song to end PHM. It's about a man who is devoted to a woman but she will not commit to him, therefore professing his outrage and his desire.

Well you've got me working so hard lately
Working my hands until they bleed
If I was twice the man I could be
I'd still be half of what you need
Still you lead me and I follow
Anything you ask you know I'll do
But this one act of consecration is what I ask of you

Ringfinger
Promise carved in stone
Deeper than the sea
Ringfinger
Sever flesh and bone
And offer it to me

You just leave me nailed here
Hanging like Jesus on this cross
I'm just dying for your sins
And aiding to the cause

Ringfinger
Promise carved in stone
Deeper than the sea
Ringfinger
Sever flesh and bone
And offer it to me

Wrap my eyes in bandages
Confessions I see through
I get everything I want
When I get part of you

Ringfinger
Promise carved in stone
Deeper than the sea
Ringfinger
Sever flesh and bone
And offer it to me
Ringfinger
Promise carved in stone
Deeper than the sea
Ringfinger
Devil's flesh and bone
Do something for me


These lyrics are to be with Ringfinger but I cannot make them
out in the song. Possibly at the end?


I'm so tired I can't get to sleep
And the squeaking of the bed is right in time
with the song that's repeating in my head
I just want you to know
When I do it, I only think of you

Jan 23 - Gave Up

"Gave Up" is the sixth track from the Broken album or Halo 5. Even though Broken is not necessarily an album release I considered it was because it had brand new music on it. When I first got this, I had a hard time listening to it because it was so unlike Trent's first album. The beats were driving, thunderous works of art. I was enthralled. And this song, with Trent's pleading at the beginning is magic.

    Perfect little dream the kind that hurts the most
    Forgot how it feels well almost
    No one to blame always the same
    Open my eyes wake up in flames
    
    It took you to make me realize
    It took you to make me realize
    It took you to make me realize
    It took you to make me see the light
    Smashed up my sanity
    Smashed up integrity
    Smashed up what I believed in
    Smashed up what's left of me
    Smashed up my everything
    Smashed up all that was true
    Gonna smash myself to pieces
    I don't know what else to do
    
    Covered in hope and Vaseline
    Still cannot fix this broken machine
    Watching the hole it used to be mine
    Just watching it burn in my steady systematic decline
    Of the trust I will betray
    Give it to me I throw it away
    After everything I've done I hate myself for what I've become
    
    I tried
    I gave up
    I don't know
    Throw it away

Jan 22 - Starfuckers Inc.

"Starfuckers Inc." is off the Things Falling Apart or Halo 16 album. It was remixed and manipulated by Adrian Sherwood. The siren blaring throughout the song and other manipulations were supposed to be like an old sci-fi movie. It has been widely rumored that this song was about Marilyn Manson and his lifestyle. Funny enough, he's in the video at the end.

Jan 21 - Echoplex

"Echoplex" is the fifth track off the album The Slip or Halo 27. When I first heard The Slip I just could not get over how different yet how much the same Trent's music is. The is song really resonated with me because of the piano and the guitar & the drum looping over & over again. The beat, the melody, the lyrics... Like it's washing over you, pulling you in measure by measure right at 2:20 to the end. 'And I just slowly fade away...'

 Nice and high and far apart
Just like they said
I built this place with broken parts
Just like they said
You chip away the old version of you
You'd be surprised at what you can do
I'm safe in here
Irrelevant
Just like they said

My voice just echoes off these walls

You feel me breathe
I am watching you
I see it all
The many ways you can't get to me
I see it all
I see the Hell you put yourself through
Oh the things I could do (if I wanted to)

My voice just echoes off these walls
My voice just echoes off these walls
I don't need anything at all
My voice just echoes off these walls

And I just slowly fade away

You will never ever get to me in here

I am watching you
I see it all....

Jan 20 - Now I'm Nothing (Live)

"Now I'm Nothing" was the intro song to his Lollapalooza '91 tour set. He then would immediately go into "Terrible Lie" and start the set that way. When I saw him at Lollapalooza in 1991, I had been waiting out in 114 degree heat for 8+ hours - He came onstage, tried to get through these two first songs & then trashed the stage completely as all his music that was on tapes melted from the heat. Nice huh? This song was never officially recorded or released by a studio.

Once cool fact... I FINALLY got to hear this song again live on the NIN/JA Tour!! How appropriate huh? Wave Goodbye...

    I smashed myself to pieces
    I'm gonna fuck myself up
    I'm sifting through the ashes
    Of what I have become
    
    I gave myself away
    Now I'm nothing
    I let it slip away
    Now I'm nothing
    All that I can do
    Is break myself in two
    I fucked it all away
    Now I'm nothing

Wave, wave wave... Wave goodbye

Jan 19 - Terrible Lie

"Terrible Lie" is the second track from Pretty Hate Machine or Halo 2. When I first heard this song, I immediately went out & bought PHM on CD. Back in 1989? That was one expensive CD!! And yes, I played it SO MUCH that I actually got disenchanted with this song for a time. Yes, it was a SHORT period of time, I promise! But you have to know that I played the shit out of my PHM CD! Over & over & over. And this song is so easy to sing(scream) to.

But something changed... I lost my Mom in 2003 to Breast Cancer & this song fit how I was feeling. 'I think you owe me a great big apology' was something I would scream over & over. I know this song was basically a plea to God asking Why? And that was what I was doing... Why her? Why not me? And I still do not think it's wrong to question God.

  Hey God, why are you doing this to me?
Am I not living up to what I'm supposed to be?
Why am I seething with this animosity?
Hey God, I think you owe me a great big apology

Terrible lie

Hey God, I really don't know what you mean
Seems like salvation comes only in our dreams
I feel my hatred grow all the more extreme
Hey God, can this world really be as sad as it seems?

Terrible lie

Don't take it away from me
I need you to hold on to
Don't take it away from me
I need someone to hold on to

Hey God, there's nothing left for me to hide
I've lost my ignorance, security and pride
I'm all alone in a world you must despise
Hey God, I believed the promises, your promises and lies

Terrible lie

You made me throw it all away
My morals left to decay
How many you betray
You've taken everything

Terrible lie

My head is filled with disease
My skin is begging you please
I'm on my hands and knees
I want so much to believe
I need someone to hold on to
I need someone to hold on to
I need someone to hold on to
I need someone to hold on to
I give you everything
My sweet everything

Hey God, I really don't know who I am
In this world of piss.

'Can this world really be as sad as it seems'?

Jan 18 - 9 Ghosts I

"9 Ghosts I" is the ninth track off of Ghosts I-IV or Halo 26. It starts with the piano and a synthesizer where at the begining the piano is more in focus then it builds to the synth more focused at the end. I know it seems repetitive in nature but the melody is very haunting to me... I can listen to this over & over and not be bored. If you listen to it, right at 1:36 to 2:10 there is a building and you can hear the pulsing in the note... Almost like it's rising up, becoming something else... Beautiful and exquisite.

Jan 17 - Please

"Please" is the fifth track off of The Fragile album or Halo 14. I know that this is a lesser known song but I really like the lyrics. 'And it keeps repeating, Will you please complete me'... I love that Trent is his own backup singer on this one too! He does all of the vocals on this one.

    This is how
    It begins
    Push it away and it all comes back again
    All the flesh
    All the sin
    There was a time when it used to mean just about everything
    
    Just like now
    
    Breathe, echoing the sound
    Time starts slowing down
    Sink until I drown
    (Please) I don't ever want to make it stop
    
    And it keeps repeating
    Will you please complete me?
    
    Never be enough
    To fill me up
    
    Watch the white
    Turn to red
    It fills up the hole but it grows somewhere else instead
    All my life
    Yeah yeah yeah yeah, but it just left me dead
    (Well guess what?)
    The world is over and I realized it was all in my head
    
    Now everything is clear
    I erase the fear
    I can disappear
    (Please) I don't ever want to make it stop
    
    You can never leave me
    Will you please complete me
    
    Never be enough
    To fill me up

Jan 16 - Happiness In Slavery (remix by Trent Reznor and Chris Vrenna with P.K)

This "Happiness In Slavery" version comes from the Fixed album or Halo 6. I love this version, it's repetitiveness in the percussion loop and minimal lyrics are perfect in this version. It reminds me of "Heresy". A lot of the sounds in this version come from a performance artist named Bob Flanagan. If you have ever seen the "Happiness In Slavery" video you know that it's banned because of it's extreme violence and frontal male nudity.

If you are interested in seeing the video, here it is http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=otqGFiiIoTI

WATCH AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!

Jan 15 - The Hand That Feeds (DFA Straight Mix)

"The Hand That Feeds (DFA Straight Mix)" comes from The Hand That Feeds single or Halo 18. I like this mix as it is longer than the original song. "The Hand That Feeds" was written by Trent and he was expressing his dissatisfaction with the American Government & George W. Bush & the abuse of power in our government. Trent was asked to play "The Hand That Feeds" at the 2005 MTV Music Awards but was denied his request to display a large image of W's face during the song. As a result of this, Trent canceled his performance. He then responded by posting this on nin.com -

We were set to perform 'The Hand That Feeds' with an unmolested, straightforward
image of George W. Bush as the backdrop. Apparently, the image of our President
is as offensive to MTV as it is to me. See you on tour this fall when we return
to play in America.

I love that Trent is the type of person to stand up for what he believes in.


    You're keeping in step
    In the line
    Got your chin held high and you feel just fine
    Because you do
    What you're told
    But inside your heart it is black and it's hollow
    And it's cold
    
    Just how deep do you believe?
    Will you bite the hand that feeds?
    Will you chew until it bleeds?
    Can you get up off your knees?
    Are you brave enough to see
    Do you want to change it?
    
    What if this whole crusade's
    A charade
    And behind it all there's a price to be paid
    For the blood
    On which we dine
    Justified in the name of the holy and the divine
    
    Just how deep do you believe?
    Will you bite the hand that feeds?
    Will you chew until it bleeds?
    Can you get up off your knees?
    Are you brave enough to see?
    Do you want to change it?
    
    So naïve
    To keep holding on to what I want to believe
    And I can see
    But I keep
    Holding on and on and on and on
    
    Will you bite the hand that feeds you or will you stay down on your knees?

Jan 14 - Big Man With A Gun

"Big Man With A Gun" is the ninth track off of the album The Downward Spiral or Halo 8. I love the driving percussing and guitar and can listen to this over & over & over! On this one the lyrics are pretty explicit and I did not know where this really came from. I mean, other than Closer, he does not write about sex. He writes mainly about loss and anger, not sex.

Then I found this... In a 1996 issue of Spin Magazine Trent said this: "The record was nearing completion. I had written those lyrics pretty quickly and I didn't know if I was going to use them or not. To me, Downward Spiral builds to a certain degree of madness, then it changes. That would be the last stage of delirium. So the original point of "Big Man With A Gun" was madness. But it was also making fun of the whole misogynistic gangsta-rap bulls**t. ... I listen to a lot of it, and I enjoy it. But I could do without the the degree of misogyny and hatred of women and abuse. Then, my song got misinterpreted as exactly that. It was probably a lack of being able to write. I've been taken out of context, and it's ridiculous."

Love that!! MADNESS!!!

   I am a big man
(Yes I am)
And I have a big gun
Got me a big old dick and I
I like to have fun
Held against your forehead
I'll make you suck it
Maybe I'll put a hole in your head
You know, just for the fuck of it

I can reduce you if I want
I can devour
I'm hard as fucking steel, and I've got the power
I'm every inch a man, and I'll show you somehow
Me and my fucking gun
Nothing can stop me now

Shoot shoot shoot shoot shoot
I'm going to come all over you

Me and my fucking gun
Me and my fucking gun

Jan 13 - Beside You In Time

"Beside You In Time" is the twelfth track off the album With Teeth or Halo 19. I love this song and the lyrics are so touching. I think it's about someone he lost, like his Grandmother. He was pretty torn up about losing her as I was about losing my mom... I think of my Mom when I hear this song too.

    I am all alone this time around
    Sometimes on the side I hear a sound
    Places parallel I know it's you
    Feel the little pieces bleeding through
    This goes on
    And on
    And on
    
    Now that I've decided not to stay
    I can feel me start to fade away
    Everything is back where it belongs
    I will be beside you before long
    This goes on
    And on
    And on
    
    We will never die
    Beside you in time

Jan 12 - Vessel (Bill Laswell)

"Vessel (Bill Laswell)" is a remix that appears on the Y34RZ3R0R3MIX3D album or Halo 25. Truthfully, I have no idea of who Bill Laswell is; all I know is that Trent Reznor liked this version so much that he asked permission to put this version on Halo 25. That album contains remixes from artists that Trent contacted and asked to do remixes, as well as a fan remix. I have no idea of how to work my Garage Band on my iMac, otherwise I would have done one myself!

    I let you put it in my mouth
    I let it get under my skin
    I let you pump it through my veins
    I let you take me from within
    They tell us what we can and cannot do
    Same thing we've heard a hundred times before
    When I put you inside of me
    None of that matters anymore
    
    My God
    Can it go any faster?
    Oh my God
    I don't think I can last here
    
    I am you and you are me
    We will never be alone
    I have finally found my place in everything
    I have finally found my home
    I can leave all of this flesh behind
    I can see right through this whole façade
    I am becoming something else
    I am a turning into God
    
    My God
    Can it go any faster?
    Oh my God
    I don't think I can last here

Jan 11 - Non-Entity (acoustic)

"Non-Entity" was performed at the ReactNOW! benefit, this was the first version of the song to be publicly performed. It features Reznor only on piano and vocals with a drum machine backing him. It was made available for purchase as an encrypted WMA download with proceeds going toward charities aiding those affected by Hurricane Katrina.

Also, during a chat with fans in the official NIN fan club, The Spiral, Reznor stated that these songs were outtakes from the With Teeth sessions, and studio recordings of them might one day surface. A live recording of "Non-Entity" appears on Beside You At Time.

    The sky is not the same shade of blue
    Every single thing
    I believe isn't true
    Missing in a maze of monochrome
    How did I get here
    How can I go home?
    
    The echos in my eyes
    Of all they used to see
    Burning down the world 
    The ashes and debris
    And all that's left of me
    Non-entity
    
    Try to stand in line
    Try to obey
    The ghosts of what I was keep getting in the way
    Staring at the sun
    Blinded by the light
    Now I'm afraid I'm fading out of sight
    
    The echos in my eyes
    Of all they used to see
    Burning down the world 
    Ashes and debris
    And all that's left of you
    And all that's left of me
    All have washed away
    Non-entity

Jan 10 - Sin (Short)

"Sin (Short)" is from Halo 4 and is on both the US and the UK versions. I have both CD Maxi-single's and I also have the US Vinyl version. The Sin (Short) remix is a very good driving beat. It starts out with the track taking turns coming out of the left then right speaker over & over again. The music video for Sin actually used the Sin (Short) version and was shown at Dance Clubs in the early '90's - At the time it was a very controversial video.

The one thing that Trent does is use similar lyrics from song to song...

    You give me the reason                        
    You give me control
    I gave you my Purity
    My Purity you stole
    Did you think I wouldn't recognize this compromise?
    Am I just too stupid to realize?
    Stale incense, old sweat and lies, lies, lies
    
    It comes down to this
    Your kiss
    Your fist
    And your strain
    It gets under my skin
    Within
    Take in
    The extent of my sin
    
    You give me the anger
    You give me the nerve
    Carry out my sentence
    I get what I deserve
    I'm just an effigy to be defaced
    To be disgraced
    Your need for me has been replaced
    And if I can't have everything well then just give me a taste
    
    It comes down to this
    Your kiss
    Your fist
    And your strain
    It gets under my skin
    Within
    Take in
    The extent of my sin

I get what I deserve...

Jan 9 - 24 Ghosts III

"24 Ghosts III" is one of the fantastic songs from the Ghosts I-IV album or Halo 26. I bought the custom digipak in November of 2008. I still cannot believe that I waited so long to buy the CD, I mean that I knew it was online but I really wanted the original CD. I mean, WHO in 2008 would make an album of entirely instrumental songs? For the pure joy of it? Anyone? Trent Fucking Reznor, that's who! And this song especially is such a rocking song. Easy to listen to over & over again. LOVE it!!

From ninwiki.com:
The official introduction page for the album reads:

Nine Inch Nails presents Ghosts I–IV, a brand new 36 track instrumental collection available right now. Almost two hours of new music composed and recorded over an intense ten week period last fall, Ghosts I - IV sprawls Nine Inch Nails across a variety of new terrain.

Trent Reznor explains, "I've been considering and wanting to make this kind of record for years, but by its very nature it wouldn't have made sense until this point. This collection of music is the result of working from a very visual perspective - dressing imagined locations and scenarios with sound and texture; a soundtrack for daydreams. I'm very pleased with the result and the ability :to present it directly to you without interference. I hope you enjoy the first four volumes of Ghosts."

The official site also contains the following under "More Info"

This music arrived unexpectedly as the result of an experiment. The rules were as follows: 10 weeks, no clear agenda, no overthinking, everything driven by impulse. Whatever happens during that time gets released as... something.

The team: Atticus Ross, Alan Moulder and myself with some help from Alessandro Cortini, Adrian Belew and Brian Viglione. Rob Sheridan collaborated with Artist in Residence (A+R) to create the accompanying visual and physical aesthetic.

We began improvising and let the music decide the direction. Eyes were closed, hands played instruments and it began. Within a matter of days it became clear we were on to something, and a lot of material began appearing. What we thought could be a five song EP became much more. I invited some friends over to join in and we all enjoyed the process of collaborating on this.

The end result is a wildly varied body of music that we're able to present to the world in ways the confines of a major record label would never have allowed - from a 100% DRM-free, high-quality download, to the most luxurious physical package we've ever created.

More volumes of Ghosts are likely to appear in the future.

- Trent Reznor, March 2, 2008

Jan 8 - Closer

"Closer" is the fifth track off of The Downward Spiral or Halo 8. This is probably what most people think of when they hear Nine Inch Nails. The video for this was actually played on MTV in 1994 & 1995 and was one of the most popular videos during that time.

 You let me violate you, you let me desecrate you
You let me penetrate you, you let me complicate you
Help me I broke apart my insides, help me I've got no soul to sell
Help me the only thing that works for me, help me get away from myself

I want to fuck you like an animal
I want to feel you from the inside
I want to fuck you like an animal
My whole existence is flawed
You get me closer to God

You can have my isolation, you can have the hate that it brings
You can have my absence of faith, you can have my everything
Help me tear down my reason, help me it's your sex I can smell
Help me you make me perfect, help me become somebody else

I want to fuck you like an animal
I want to feel you from the inside
I want to fuck you like an animal
My whole existence is flawed
You get me closer to God

Through every forest, above the trees
Within my stomach, scraped off my knees
I drink the honey inside your hive
You are the reason I stay alive

The day I bought my Halo 8 I listened to this song over & over & over again. The driving beat, the naughty lyrics, I was giddy with excitement! I could not wait until my friends actually heard this song! I never thought in a million years that "Closer" would have become the song that it is. I mean I knew that it was a great song, but to actually get a radio station or MTV to play "Fuck you like an animal" ??? No freaking way! God LOVE Trent Reznor!

I just found this "Making Of Closer" by Mark Romanek on YouTube:

Part 1- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qX0MHyaNfVU

Part 2- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ef0vVatpHx4

Part 3- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p1tV_4cs28Q

Jan 7 - The Great Collapse

"The Great Collapse" is from Things Falling Apart or Halo 16 and is the second song on that album. This was originally recorded for The Fragile album but did not make the cut. This is also an original composition and not a remix as most people think. Again, the percussion driven pulse drives this song. And the guitar that starts at 3:19 just gets me... LOVE it.

Also all the whispering vocals were done by Trent Reznor but altered to sound female. The only lyrics are "Now you know, This is what it feels like" which is a lyric from "The Wretched" but is not a derivative of that song.

The best way to describe this song is this: Blast this at full volume while driving through the mountains in California with the windows down and sunroof open. Pure pleasure!

Jan 6 - The Wretched

"The Wretched" is my MOST favorite of all NIN songs. This is the fourth track on the Left Disc of The Fragile or again Halo 14. The first time I heard this I was blown away by the driving beat of the song. And the lyrics...

Just a reflection
Just a glimpse
Just a little reminder
Of all the what abouts
And all the might have
Could have beens
Another day
Some other way
But not another reason to continue
And now you're one of us
The Wretched

The hopes and prays
The better days
The far aways
Forget it

It didn't turn out the way you wanted it to
It didn't turn out the way you wanted it, did it?
It didn't turn out the way you wanted it to
It didn't turn out the way you wanted it, did it?

Now you know
This is what it feels like
Now you know
This is what it feels like

The clouds will part
And the sky cracks open
And God Himself
Will reach His fucking arm through
Just to push you down
Just to hold you down
Stuck in this hole
With the shit and the piss
And it's hard to believe
It could come down to this
Back at the beginning
Sinking
Spinning

And in the end
We still pretend
The time we spend
Not knowing when
You're finally free
And you could be

But it didn't turn out the way you wanted it to
It didn't turn out quite the way that you wanted it

Now you know
This is what it feels like
Now you know
This is what it feels like

You can try to stop it but it keeps on coming
You can try to stop it but

I have to tell you that the first time I heard this song I loved it, but I had to listen to it again just to hear the lyrics. The one line about God reaching his arm down really got to me. I was at a time in my life where that's what it felt like - God holding me down under his thumb and me not able to get anywhere. "Back at the beginning, sinking, spinning." I was pissed and this song allowed me to vent that anger. God I fucking love this song.

Jan 5 - The Collector

"The Collector" is from the With Teeth or Halo 19 album. I like this song primarily for the odd timing it has. The music goes from a 3/4-3/4-3/4 to a 4/4 time. And the chorus is a 4/4-4/4-6/4 pattern. For a drummer like me it is a tricky song to keep time to and with Dave Grohl playing drums on the studio version? I love to pretend that I'm him banging away!

    I pick things up
    I am a collector
    And things, well things
    They tend to accumulate
    I have this net
    It drags behind me
    And it picks up feelings
    For me to feed upon
    
    There are times, plenty of times
    I wish I could let it go
    But they start to breathe
    And they start to grow inside me
    There are times, plenty of times
    I wish I could let it go
    But they start to make me think
    Things I don't want to know
    
    I'm trying to fit it all inside
    I'm trying to open my mouth wide
    I'm trying not to choke and
    Swallow it all
    Swallow it all
    Swallow it all
    Swallow it all
    
    I am the plague
    I am the swarm
    All your hurt sticks on me
    And I keep it warm
    They make me stay
    They won't let me leave
    There are so God damned many of them
    It gets hard to breathe
    
    I'm trying to fit it all inside
    I'm trying to open my mouth wide
    I'm trying not to choke inside
    I am a good boy and
    Will swallow it all
    Swallow it all
    Swallow it all
    Swallow it all
    
    Every last one
    Every last one
    Every last one
    Every last one

Note: Trent stated that initially this was his favorite song on With Teeth.

Jan 4 - Leaving Hope

"Leaving Hope" is from the Still album or Halo 17 CD2, which was a companion album to And All That Could Have Been or Halo 17 CD1. This is another instrumental that I just love. The piano at the beginning is so beautiful... It reminds me of birds flying. I don't know why, it just does. According to Trent, he has said that he did this song at the bottom of his addiction... To me it's almost as if he is being reborn in this Amazing song.

Fact: Did you know that "Leaving Hope" is the name in which Trent Reznor copyrights his music? Cool huh!?!

Jan 3 - Head Like A Hole (Soil)

"Head Like A Hole (Soil)" remix came on my Halo 3 Maxi-single CD, US version. I have both the UK and the US versions and played them constantly for years. I still have both original CD's!

This one is the longest of all the "Head Like A Hole" remixes at 6:38. I found it to be very "dancey" and asked for this version every time I went out to Anderson's Fifth Estate in Snottsdale, AZ. Now I know that it did not have the heavy bass synthesizer in this version but I always like the odd drums. Love!

    God Money I'll do anything for you
    God Money just tell me what you want me to
    God Money nail me up against the wall
    God Money don't want everything he wants it all
    No you can't take it
    No no you can't take it
    (You can't take that away from me)
    
    Head like a hole
    Black as your soul
    I'd rather die than give you control
    Head like a hole
    Black as your soul
    I'd rather die than give you control
    
    Bow down before the one you serve
    You're going to get what you deserve
    
    God Money's not looking for the cure
    God Money's not concerned about the sick among the pure
    God Money let's go dancing on the backs of the bruised
    God Money's not one to choose
    No you can't take it
    No no you can't take it
    No you can't take that away from me
    
    Head like a hole
    Black as your soul
    I'd rather die than give you control
    Head like a hole
    Black as your soul
    I'd rather die than give you control
    
    Bow down before the one you serve
    You're going to get what you deserve
    You know who you are

I'd rather die than give you control....

Jan 2 - Wish

"Wish" is the second song on the Broken album or Halo 5 which came out in 1992. The Broken album was a really cool album as this was the first time I bought a CD that was a paper housing and not a plastic jewel case. It was the tri-fold design and also had a small mini-disc that came with it. I later found out that only the first 200,000 CD's had this and it was a rarity.

I was 21 in 1992 and the lyrics were insane to me...

    This is the first day of my last days
    I built it up now I take it apart climbed up real high now fall down real far
    No need for me to stay the last thing left I just threw it away
    I put my faith in God and my trust in you
    Now there's nothing more fucked up I could do
    
    Wish there was something real wish there was something true
    Wish there was something real in this world full of you
    
    I'm the one without a soul I'm the one with this big fucking hole
    No new tale to tell twenty-six years on my way to Hell
    Gotta listen to your big time hard line bad luck fist fuck
    Don't think you're having all the fun
    You know me I hate everyone
    
    Wish there was something real wish there was something true
    Wish there was something real in this world full of you
    
    I want to but I can't turn back
    But I want to


Put my faith in God put my trust in you, Now there's nothing more fucked up I could do
Wish there was something real Wish there was something true

That really shocked me.  I mean... Questioning God?  Wow. That was foreign to me.
But the more I listened to his lyrics and that song, the more I questioned my faith.
Blindly being a little sheeple at 21.  This song woke me up.  Made me realize that
I was a leader and I was not content being sheeple.  I was going to question everything.

Jan 1 - La Mer

"La Mer" is the eleventh track of the left disc on The Fragile or Halo 14. When I first heard this song, I thought "An instrumental? From Trent? WTF?" As I listened to the bass line I could hear an infusion of songs... The piano and the old-timey piano threw me off... It sounded like one of those play pianos from back in the '70's that we played pretend with. Then I heard a woman softly saying things in French and that threw me off too. Then the drums come in and make the beat even more so... Different! Then to top it all off, I could hear "Into The Void" and I love that song. I truly love this song and it is a good way to start off this tribute to Trent Reznor and Nine Inch Nails.

I have discovered that the lyrics are in Creole French:

Et il est un jour arrivé
Marteler le ciel
Et marteler la mer

Et la mer avait embrassé moi
Et la délivré moi de ma cellule

Rien ne peut m'arrêter maintenant

The translation goes like this:

And when the day arrives
I'll become the sky
And I'll become the sea

And the sea will come to kiss me
For I am going
Home

Nothing can stop me now

There is an alternate, more literal translation of the lyrics:

And the day has arrived
To thresh the sky
And to thresh the sea

And the sea has embraced me
And it has dispensed me from my cage

Nothing can stop me now

Damn right nothing can stop me now!!!